Little Finger & Thumb

Wednesday & Saturday are the days which waking up my daughter in the morning is an easy job to do, compared to other days. Why? Because Wednesday & Saturday are feeding-fishes-day. See, there is a fish pond in her school. She and her friends love to watch those fishes playing around in the pond. I bought a pack of fish food, put it in smaller packs and let her & friends feed the fishes twice in a week. Each kid has one turn to throw a small spoon of fish food to the fishes. I love seeing them yell happily and love more seeing each let others share the turn.


Yesterday was the feeding day. My daughter & I arrived at school earlier and some of her friends already stood near the pond. Quickly they started to feed the fishes. Later when the food pack was empty, one of my daughter's friend just arrived and got mad since she was late and didn't get the chance to feed. She showed her little finger to my daughter which in their world, it means "We are not friends anymore". My daughter's face turned between confused, sad, and a bit angry. She looked at me and said, "What's so big deal of not feeding the fishes? What's so fun about feeding the fishes?" I touched her shoulder, bended down, and said to her, "It's ok. Later in the classroom, just stay calm, no need to show your little finger to her. Just keep being friends." She said nothing and I know she didn't feel well. Her friend already went into class and my daughter had lost the fun in the pond so she walked into the class too. I followed her.

In the class, she looked at her friend who didn't want to look at her. So I said to her friend, "We'll feed the fishes on Wednesday, ok?" Her friend said nothing and went out again. My daughter looked at me and said she wanted to go to the pond again. I nodded. She ran fastly to follow her friend and I walked just behind her to see what will happen.


I controlled myself not to get involved because I want to see how my daughter will handle such kind of situation. Near the pond, both of them bended, looking at the fishes. I saw my daughter offered her right thumb which in their world, it means 'be friends again'. I hold my breath, afraid of having to see my daughter accept refusal. Oh, thanks God, my daughter's friend touched the thumb with her own thumb... friends again!!! Then as like nothing had happened, they put their hands in each shoulder and talked about the fishes funly again. Smile and laugh as usual.

It's amazing to witness how kids settle their own conflict with their own ways. Two thumbs up, kids!